Happy New Year! *insert champagne bottle, glass clinking, and party popper emojis* I hope that you enjoyed ringing in the New Year. It’s officially 2019, and you know what that means: time to kick your resolutions or goals into high gear. Somehow, January 1 is symbolic and represents an opportunity to “turn it around” with a fresh calendar year.
#DYK: 80% of new year’s resolutions fail or are abandoned by the second week in February [x]. That’s why I’ve decided to put my goals in writing so I can publicly hold myself accountable.
- Life isn’t all about perfectly curated moments and that’s where I think social platforms (esp. Instagram) have added unnecessary personal stress to my daily life. When I started my Tumblr in 2008, it was because I was having a hard time adapting to life back in the states and was desperate to be creative and connect and be distracted. It gave me something to look forward to every day, regardless of what was going on in the rest of my life. My Tumblr—and later this, my lifestyle blog—were places I really documented and shared beyond staged photos and the need to collect heart-shaped likes. This year alone, I have continuously compared myself to others on IG who have massive levels of success (follower counts and #sponcon) and have found myself believing I’m not good enough and I find myself spiraling in self-hate all too frequently.
Goal: Decide who I am online and how to share a more authentic self on social.
- Talk therapy has helped me cope with feelings, problem solve, and [attempt to] change behavioral patterns. I started seeing a psychologist in a moment of crisis during the summer, but stopped in the winter after insurance ceased covering my visits. During my time away, I realized I’m not quite ready to fly on my own, and that’s ok.
Goal: Return to seeing my therapist once a month.
- Social media and my own insecurities (and body dysmorphia) prohibit me from doing regular things that many wouldn’t even take for granted, like being shirtless. At this moment in my life, I would never post a photo of me with a shirt on, let alone go to a public pool.
Goal: Focus on being body positive (and take a shirtless photo, if only for myself).
- I was forced to read X-number of books per year growing up, so I believe I developed an unhealthy relationship with reading, although, when I do read now, I enjoy it. And it’s a fact that reading books is time well spent (*cough* “More Scientific Evidence That Reading is Good For You”). Shamelessly, I was really inspired to pick up more books thanks to Reese Witherspoon, Emma Roberts, and Hilary Duff.
Goal: With all of the competing distractions (social media, eh), reading more books is difficult — but far from impossible.
“…One day you will look at those photos, with much kinder eyes and say, ‘dear God, I was a beautiful thing!’” —Moira Rose, Schitt’s Creek (S2:E9)